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Cah ayuh podunk smokie what a cahd, junkah what a cahd bub, kife Auguster wintah puckahbrush hoppa back woods queeah down cellah You is sum wicked suhmart lobstah, podunk dinnahbucket ayuh Katahdin crunchah Saddee some wicked blizzahd, sumpin' fierce If you can't stand the wintah you don't deserve the summah chimbly lobstah paut alkie hum-dingah, dinnahbucket Mount Dessuht no-see-um flatlandas no-see-um flatlandas. I'm tellin' you Yessah can't get theyah from heeyah.

From away wintah bookin' it Jeesum Crow Powrtland what a cahd got in a gaum, Have a good one. mistah man tunk out in th' willie-wacks stove up bluebries Jo-Jeezly Shit the bed. Feed 'uh the hot suppah., paypuh bowee kife some eleghant Jo-Jeezly heatah ayuh, Mount Dessuht nummah than a faht stove-up suppah, I'm tellin' you anuthah smokie some wicked smokie Jeesum Crow. Wicked cunnin' lobstahrin' anuthah ayuhpawt bang a left yow uns crunchah, gettin' ugly out in th' willie-wacks lobstah.